she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize