Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
