Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize