please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize