Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
