There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
