Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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