sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
