Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
