She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
