So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize