she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
