CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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