you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I just had sex on a roof
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
