Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
sex in a hospital.. check
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
