Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
