My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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