White coat. Heels.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Can I color on your dick again?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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