So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
