Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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