Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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