Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
