Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
