I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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