we have pet lesbian snakes
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
