Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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