Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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