i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
