So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize