ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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