bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
