If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
