You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Please, let me fuck your mom
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
