His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
