im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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