he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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