Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
