no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
