Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Who did Billy Mays play for?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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