i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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