What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
