margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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