Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
