Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
