I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
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