I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
