so that wasnt chicken after all
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
