i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
