Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
