I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
