come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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